Kaelu's Diary - YOU BOYS KEEP OUT!

[shouriko]

Year 2946 - Early Spring

Ooh, Nanlu almost stepped on my last nerve. She is really starting to enter into that rebellious stage. I don’t remember being that way at 15 turns. Sure, I still quarreled with Lueek and Naneek, but they always started it. For some reason Nanlu is just testing everyone’s threads. She keeps talking about weaving, and that’s fine, but does she really have to pester me about what trade I will take? If Ma and Pa actually cared enough to pester me, I might have chosen one already, but there are so many options. I just don’t know which one is best and if I can’t be free in it, no one will keep me as their apprentice. It’s great that Nanlu has found her calling, even Laelu seems to be drawn to being harper more than ever. Everyone seems so decisive. I have never been like this before and on top of that, a dragonrider came by just this evening asking after me. He says his dragon has taken a liking to me and that by tomorrow I should decide either to stay here or join him in the Weyr and stand as a candidate.

Ugh! Everyone thinks that this is so easy! I’d love to go, it’d be such an adventure and I want to do something to help with this silly war. I just know I’d be a walking talking target for ridicule, though. As if it’s not bad enough I’m Holdborn, I’m Harperborn too, and a girl at that! Like I don’t know what they say at Weyrs about people like me. I’d have a lot of opposition. Actually, it would be a lot of fun. I would be able to meet a lot of new people and if I failed, I could always just become a harper anyway, not that Ma and Pa care much for what I do anyway. I always had to scream to get their attention anyways, they’d hardly miss me at all. I think it might be good for me. I’d like a good opposition now and again other than Lueek and Naneek.

I bet I’d impress blue! They’re rather pretty, boys, yes, but they can be so pretty. Besides, greens are so flighty I hear, emotional and all over the place wherry-brained. And don’t get me started on the golds, all stuck-up prim and proper princesses. They always end up impressing the worst mannered or the most feminine shy dainty women. I need a stronger dragon than that, one who can catch attention and keep it, one who can be heard and treated well. Yes, I think blue would do, blue like that rider’s dragon. Say, is that why I like the color? Hmmm, nah! Couldn’t be, I can’t be biased that quickly.

Yes, I’ll accept the search. What’s the worst that could happen? I could impress the silly gold or a mindless green. Hah! Me a goldrider, now that’d be something, wouldn’t it?

[shouriko]

Year 2946 - Late Summer

Well, I can't say that a Weyr is a whole lot of mindless women and roguish men anymore. I'm glad I didn't come in here thinking that and believing it whole-heartedly. Sure, some people gave me a hard time and I still get some rough treatment, but how can you blame them? Everyone here has such a history and they've all earned their place. I can respect that. I'm working hard too! Harder than some of the other girls and I haven't stopped being the mighty defender of the young and weak neither.

Just the other sevenday a new boy came in, he was going to be a beasthandler and was really looking forward to it. He's young, too, as young as they allow. Now he isn't the skittish type, but when you go from a familiar place to an unknown one and you're shy and a bit scared, it's no wonder you shut down under torment. Ugh. So dispicable. Those older Weyr boys think they're all high and mighty, but I told them off all right. You bet I did. They started on him about how he couldn't do anything right and how no dragon would want him, but I snapped right into action.

I told them 'bout how a dragon always has a good reason, but they don't tell us why all the time. A dragon makes a decision based on the heart and the mind, not on the body, or the age, or the where their from, or who they once were. A dragon picked me out and here I was and a dragon picked him out and here he was and a dragon picked them out and they were here anyway, so we're all on equal footing. One day a dragon will pick us because to them we are the very best and no one can say they are wrong. We might know why they picked us, but they did and they did it for their own reason, not for a whim. And if they were so high and mighty Weyrbreds then they'd know that already and do their own work better than trying to get others to do it, else they'd be stuck in the latrines for lack of duty thereof.

Of course, no boy likes being yelled at by a girl and some hate being defended by one, but let me tell you, once you get up in their faces and show you aren't scared of 'em... Let's just say they back off real fast and learn to keep their distance of the new kid. He's doing much better today and I'm glad. One of the other boys actually apologized and isn't such a foul-mouthed wherry brain after all. I guess playing rough with my brothers has paid off a bit.

As for the girls, well, they're all so much prettier than I am and one of them is a real ace, came from Benden college. I'm sure she'll do well, but there's another who's a real dragon-lady in the bad sense. She keeps saying she'll take gold and lord over the Weyr and has all these grand plans. Really, in all honesty, how can she say such a thing and make such a judgment so soon? She'll not impress with that mindset, or maybe she will, golds like that and she'd probably be a right git as well. They'd deserve each other.

Though, if I were the Weyrwoman, I'd do something about these raids. I'd find out just what that OverHolder was planning and I'd keep everyone in the Holds and the Weyr safe. Someone has to stand and say that enough is enough and we won't stand for it any longer. Just like those Southern girls who impress, how can they do that to them? If a dragon finds them worthy is that not proof enough? I'd want to do something if I could, but I'd have to be Weyrwoman to do that. I'd have to impress a snobbish gold and would that even be worth it?

Maybe if I knew it would make a difference then it would be.

[shouriko]

Year 2947 - Early Spring

The hatching finally came just two days ago. Everything is different, nothing is how it was before, not even me. I used to think I knew myself pretty well and I that I knew exactly what I wanted, but apparently I was wrong. It's not a bad thing I guess, to be wrong, at least not in my case. I mean I've suddenly gone from being someone who has tried very hard all my life to get attention to be someone everyone wants to be friends with. Though I can't say those who know me already and want to be my friends now are really friends, maybe someday they'll become someone I can truly count as a friend. Besides, real friends don't come along just because of something as silly as the color of dragon you ride.

Incidently, that is why I am writing today. If the hatching occurred two days earlier that means I have been a Weyrling for two days already. Even more impressive, I've been Junior Weyrwoman for two days also. That's right, somehow I managed to not only catch the eye, but also the heart of the gold dragon. I didn't do anything special but stand there, but that is all you need to do.

Kyrieth really is something else. She isn't a little snob and in fact she is a lot like me, though she is incredibly decisive. Or maybe judgemental is a better word for it. She is very pretty though and you can tell she knows that too! Kyrieth always walks as if she is on stage or as if someone important might be watching, it's as if she just knows that no matter what there is an image that goes with her and she lives it to the fullest extent possible. What I like best about her though is how she cares about the others. When one of the other hatchlings tripped over his egg shells and got cut, she encouraged him to get up and keep going. I was so amazed. Kyrieth was so mature in that moment, but don't think she is like that all the time. She has a childish side beneath that cool outer self of hers, I caught her chasing her tail this morning. It was so cute!

I was right about one thing, though, riding gold is not about glory. Some of the girls thought that it was an easy thing to do, but I've come to find that it is a job that takes all of your time and lasts for all of your life. It is up to you to take care of everyone and see that they are safe, happy, and maintained. It's like taking care of hundreds of Nanlu's and Laelu's! Only there are mostly adults. I have to keep the peace, see that rules are made fairly and upheld, and pretty much be like a Lord Holder. On top of that, I'm the figurehead for the dragonriders and as if that is not enough there are times that I lead the entire Weyr into battles and negotiations! Though there is one obvious duty and that is to supply the next generation upon generation of riders and protectors and warriors. It's like being a mother only not exactly. I guess I'd be the grandmother and Kyrieth would be the mother. She'll have hundreds of children and they'd be my grandchildren! Hundreds!

It really is a lot of work. A lot of pressure and expectations out there. I like the challenge, but I don't want to let anyone down, not me or Kyrieth or everyone who will look to me when Kyrieth grows up. I guess I'll have to be extra diligent to be myself, work on my job, and learn all I can. It should be fun if I do it all with a smile.

Ah, but I guess now I can make a few changes one day. That and this war going on, I didn't realize how big it was and the secret politics. Apparently Southern might be the powerhouse, but the mastermind is Lord OverHolder Hallek. I wish I knew more, but no one else knows much else. That's something else we need to change. If he is going to attack us and the Holds, I'll just have to stop him. Me and the entire Weyr. I will protect the North from him, he cannot take us as if we are fruit to be picked! I'll show him!

Oooh, Kyrieth is waking up, I better wrap it up. I'll say this one last thing: I don't know what is going on in that Southern Weyr exactly, but somehow we've gotta talk to them and if that doesn't work, we'll just have to force them to. Somehow they have to know that what is going on is wrong, right?